Lore Post: LoreQuest: The Quest for Lore part 8
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Beefcat 2025-03-21:
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Title: LoreQuest: The Quest for Lore part 8
EXT. DIRT ROAD, OUTBACK, NIGHT
>2015<
GRACE and HOPPY are in the car driving home.
HOPPY
Why isn't Daddy coming home with us?
GRACE's tears slowly give way to anger.
GRACE
I told him not to go looking for a fight with Ruugosus.
HOPPY
Who is Ruugosus?
GRACE
I can tell you later. Try to get some sleep, it's past your bedtime.
CUT TO:
EXT. TOD AND TODSON'S OUTBACK COFFEE, DAY
>2025<
HOPPY
Ruugosus! My name is Hoppy McRageface. You killed my father. Prepare to die!
AUS. RUUGOSUS
What the sigma?
AUS. TODPUNK comes running from the coffee shop, followed by AUS. JACOBOCO.
AUS. TODPUNK (out of breath)
Wait up! I almost forgot to tell you my enchilada story.
BREESKI
What enchilada story?
AUS. TODPUNK
...I can't remember. But it was really good!
BEEFCAT
Hey, no talking Mexican food until Ninjawarchicken shows up.
AUS. JACOBOCO takes a closer look at HOPPY
AUS. JACOBOCO
You look familiar. Have we met?
HOPPY
I don't think so. I'm here for Ruugosus. He killed my father.
AUS. GOFIGURE
Whaaat? Ruu wouldn't hurt a fly!
JACOBOCO
I thought you said he's "fought heaps of kangaroos".
AUS. GOFIGURE
Yeah, in Quake 3. He's not some psychopath who goes around beating up animals.
AUS. RUUGOSUS
I think I can clear this up. You must be Joey's kid. I was there the night he died, but I did not kill him.
CUT TO:
INT. DIVE BAR, NIGHT - FLASHBACK (2015)
AUS. RUUGOSUS is sat at a table playing QUAKE 3 on an old school CRT monitor. Opposite him is a drunken kangaroo, also playing Quake on another monitor.
DRUNK KANGAROO
Dammit Ruu, how did you get so good with that rail gun?
AUS. RUUGOSUS
When you bunnyhop everywhere like that it's super easy to land my shots.
DRUNK KANGAROO
What can I say, it's my nature.
The DRUNKEN KANGAROO gets up and leaves. JOEY MCRAGEFACE kicks open the front door and steps inside.
JOEY
I heard someone was lookin' for a fight!
AUS. RUUGOSUS
Good timing, have a seat mate. Space maps okay?
JOEY
Q3DM17 all day long motherfucker.
JOEY goes to sit at the vacant computer, but trips on a loose ethernet cable. He falls down, face planting right into the CRT monitor. His head crashes through the glass. Sparks and smoke fly everywhere as he is electrocuted.
AUS. RUUGOSUS
What the fuuuuuuuuuuuck.
The BARTENDER grabs JOEY's arm to check his pulse.
BARTENDER
He's dead, Jim.
CUT TO:
EXT. TOD AND TODSON'S OUTBACK COFFEE, DAY
AUS. RUUGOSUS
Sorry it had to happen like that mate.
AUS. JACOBOCO takes another close look at HOPPY.
AUS. JACOBOCO
Oh my god, you're that kangaroo's kid!
AUS. JACOBOCO runs back into the coffee shop.
HOPPY
So...It was an accident?
AUS. RUUGOSUS
'fraid so.
AUS. JACOBOCO returns from the coffee shop with the kangaroo head espresso machine.
AUS. JACOBOCO
I think this should go to you.
AUS. TODPUNK
Jacob don't go around giving my stuff away, I worked hard on that.
AUS. JACOBOCO
It's his dad, this is the least we can do.
AUS. JACOBOCO hands the espresso machine to HOPPY
AUS. JACOBOCO
Here you go, I think it's what's left of your dad.
HOPPY
Ummm, thanks I guess? This is not quite the closure I was expecting...
AUS. JACOBOCO
Yeah this is super awkward. I'm sorry my dad turned your dad into an espresso machine.
AUS. TODPUNK
You know what, fine, take it. I've been wanting to make a new one out of a koala anyways.
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